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Benjamin’s Birth Story
By Jeff
The story starts on December 6th, one day before our estimated due date. Mindy had joined my dad and I for lunch downtown and was relaxing in my cubicle waiting for me to finish up that day’s work so I could ride home with her.
At about 2:45 I came back to my cubicle and Mindy excitedly told me under her breath, “I think I had a contraction. It’s probably Braxton-Hicks, but it’s the first I’ve been sure that it was really a contraction.”
Well, it turned out to be Braxton-Hicks and over the next few days, for about 6 hours a day Mindy would have these warm-up contractions, and we’d try not to get our hopes up that they might lead to the real thing.
On Wednesday the 11th we had our regularly scheduled prenatal appointment and when Mindy came by my office to pick me up, she had a list of the contractions she’d been having. They weren’t terribly strong, but they were relatively consistent in frequency and duration. Again we tried not to get too excited, but I admit, I thought that would be the day. Desiree admitted that it could be the beginning, but we should watch to carefully because like a watched pot it may never boil. We left excited and tried not to time every contraction, but we were very excited.
By Saturday the excitement and anticipation was starting to wear us down a little. The contractions seemed to be fairly regular and would even increase in intensity and frequency if we went for walks. But they always subsided shortly after we got home. Monday came and went in much the same way. On Tuesday the 17th I was able to finish up at work early and was headed home around 3:30 or 4:00. I gave Mindy a call to let her know I was coming and she told me that she’d had some contractions that actually hurt. They weren’t bad and she was having trouble timing them, so she didn’t think it was anything to get excited about. Especially since she had taken another long walk that day after lunch.
Somehow, I had a hunch that it would start tonight and even if it didn’t we had to take advantage of the fact that we could still go out to dinner whenever we wanted to. So we went to the Olive Garden and enjoyed a nice meal and some really special “us” time.
During the entire meal the contractions continued with the same intensity and when we got home, I told Mindy she should call Andaluz to keep them abreast of the situation and ask if they had any advice. Shortly after we walked in the door, Desiree called to see how we were doing and to let us know of a couple of things that we should consider if we were to go over 2 weeks past due. We told her about the contractions and she seemed to think things had started, but that we definitely had a long way to go. She told us to call when they were 4 to 5 minutes from the start of one to the start of the next.
So Mindy and I got comfortable and relaxed in the living room trying to not concentrate on every contraction. At about 9:30, Mindy had a contraction that made her have to sit down and that’s when we knew we were starting to get serious. We climbed in to bed hoping that we’d be able to get a little bit of rest before this all started, but that just wasn’t to be. The contractions were now averaging 7 minutes apart and lasting for around 50 seconds. We were confused because we didn’t think they should last that long until they got closer to 3 or 4 minutes apart. We just kept working at it with Mindy catching a few winks between contractions, and me trying to make sure it was me who woke her and not the pain of a contraction.
At about 1:30, they were getting very intense, but still 6 or 7 minutes from the start of one to the start of the next. Mindy ran through the shower while I packed the car and then left to go to the West Side of town. My parents live only 5 minutes from Andaluz and we figured that we would rather make the 45-minute drive now, if the contractions were already this intense. The ride would surely be much more unpleasant if the contractions were this intense and only 4 minutes apart.
We arrived at my parents around 2:30 and they had setup a bed for us to labor in private and we went to work. The contractions continued to be 6 or 7 minutes from the start of one to the start of the next, but soon they were lasting between 2 and 3 minutes each. At about 5:45 we finally decided to call the midwives. Heather answered and we told her the situation. Then I checked Mindy’s cervix and called Heather back. Mindy was about 3 cm dilated. We decided that we would keep laboring at my parents until 8:30 when Andaluz opened up, unless something changed dramatically.
We left my parents at 8:15 and arrived at Andaluz around 8:45 after fighting rush-hour traffic on I-5. Sonja checked Mindy’s cervix and after giving us a surprised look, said she’d feel better if Desiree checked it before she told us any thing, because she felt she couldn’t be sure. At around 9:10 Desiree checked Mindy’s cervix and said that she was 8 cm dilated and at +1 station. We couldn’t believe it: 5 cm in 3 ½ hours. We got Mindy into the tub quickly and I managed to race out to the car and bring the rest of the bags in between one contraction and the next. During the next break I changed into my swim trunks and got into the pool with Mindy. We had a tape playing that Mindy had made and soon Sonja, Desiree, Michelle and Heather were all there watching quietly and offering support when we needed it.
I sat behind her for quite awhile and she breathed deeply through some more very intense contractions. The water was a great help because she could just let her arms float and let me support her while she relaxed the whole rest of her body.
At around 10:15 Desiree suggested that we try a hands and knees position to get some different work done in moving the baby down. These contractions continued to be intense with 2 coming one right after the other and then a short break before the next one.
All of a sudden I heard Desiree say, “You can push if you want to,” and Mindy started with a couple small pushes. It was about 10:45. During one of the early ones her water broke and then she started pushing in earnest.
At about 11:00 the contractions spaced apart and that should have clued me in, but I was taken totally by surprise when Desiree suggested that Mindy move to one side of the tub and I sit facing her with her knees over mine... “so you can catch the baby.”
“Already,” I cried excitedly and incredulously, as I looked at the woman I love more than anything in the world. Our dream was about to become a reality. Mindy started really bearing down now and soon, I could see a head popping out when she pushed. Desiree had me feel it and there was a hairy ridge of skin there. I was confused and Desiree explained that was just the excess scalp being scrunched together as the head was being pushed out. Soon the head was staying out and I was providing counter-pressure on Mindy’s perineum. As the baby completed crowning, Desiree came back and helped guide Mindy in the last few pushes so that she didn’t push too fast and cause any bad tearing. After a couple really difficult pushes the head came out and the shoulders followed quickly afterward. I cradled the baby in my hands as Mindy and I rushed together to surround this baby with our bodies. We began singing the lullaby that we’d sung to him so many times in the womb, only this time instead of alternating “Baby Boy” and “Baby Girl”, we could sing “Benjamin fusses, Benjamin laughs. The angel who watches says ‘Hey, look at that!’...”
Benjamin Wayne **** was born on 12/18/2002 at 11:51am. He weighed 8 lbs. 3 oz. and was 20 ½ inches long.
